Daily life is sadhana enough. Our humanity is imperfection enough.
Our humanity is imperfection enough to provide a spiritual burr under-the-saddle!
When we finally understand that no spiritual technologies can guarantee or manipulate the receipt of divine grace, what do we do? We continue practicing and surrendering to the fact that we cannot extort the unearned blessing of grace. The relationship most of us who are spiritual seekers have with Life, the Divine and “God” or The Universe, is, however subtly a blunt quid pro quo. A tacit tit for tat. We grasp at the seriousness of our commitment and have a secret sense of entitlement as a result. The best gift that we can get if this is indeed our M. O. is to utterly fail in our attempts to coerce the universe to give us what we seek. Or to actually succeed and to find that what we thought we needed fell short of the mark.
The missing thing we are pursuing by engaging in spiritual practice is more of a statement of what we think we do not have than any actual engagement with the divine. We are moths to God’s flame.
Any seeking then is simultaneously an admission of the failure of “arrival”. Yet try, struggle and persist we must through all the inevitable failures of the search for what we cannot know, in a direction nothing visible can send us towards. It is the earnestness and innocence of our quest that lends it a lighthouse urgency which the divine appears to devour with its own voracity of appetite. The “one step towards G-O-D,” that invites “G-O-D’s three steps toward us cannot happen if there is the slightest hint of expectation in our flailing Godwards.
We are keeping ourselves honed and opened at a certain vibrational level by our consistently conscious interruption of the personal internal monolog through spiritual practice. Through this deliberate practice of non-expectation, we create a space of pregnant emptiness in us. This emptiness is NOT emotional withdrawal misnamed “detachment”, and this emptiness, if true, allows us to be alive to a vastness of connection to the unknowability of the Mystery that we are.
If we do not preempt it by in-filling this emptiness with the reactive patterning of habitually unconscious responses to the flow of life as it occurs, with all the competing contrasts that this flow implies, then that emptiness can be seeded with the Mystery Itself, allowing us to experience arrival from a “place” we have never left.